If You Break Up Before Valentine's, You're An A**hole
Back in the beginning of 2011, I showed you a chart that graphed out the most likely times a break up would happen. From that chart, we learned that there are couple times each year when a break up is more likely to happen and they all make sense.
The most common time is the two weeks before Christmas. Then there’s April Fools Day, which is kind of rude but funny at the same time. Then there’s the weeks leading up to spring break and summer break, for obvious reasons. But the fourth most common time for a break up is – drum roll, please – the two weeks before Valentine’s Day.
It’s a general rule that break ups suck but a break up before Valentine’s Day sucks so much more. It’s kind of like finding out you have to work the night of the concert you’ve been waiting on for months. Or like someone telling you that they don’t love you enough to even sit through another Valentine’s Day dinner with you.
Don’t get me wrong, I understand the feeling. If you know you want to break up with someone, why wait until after you’ve dropped some cash on a gift. It makes sense that you wouldn’t want to keep pouring resources into a black hole of suck.
But I always wonder, do these people not know they wanted to break up a few weeks ago? Did the rapidly impending holiday of romance suddenly make them realize they weren’t actually in love? I doubt it. Which means they either have really bad timing and social awareness or they’re a cheap bastard who doesn’t really care about their partner’s feelings. I’m inclined to think it’s the latter, which make them an asshole.
Good break up etiquette states that when you’re close to any big event, it’s best to just wait it out. How would you like it if someone broke up with you right before your birthday or the day after a family member dies? It’s cruel and hurtful.
You don’t have to wait forever but you should wait… at least long enough for things to return back to normal. Consider it a human courtesy, a pay-it-forward, good karma deal, if you must. If you’re business minded, consider it a closing cost. It doesn’t matter how you justify it to yourself, just wait. Otherwise, you’re just going to look like a huge asshole.
That being said, if the relationship, it might be best to just pull the plug. You’ll still probably look like an asshole but it’s better to spend Valentine’s Day alone then to be unhappy.
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That’s it for today you sexy mofos. Keep it sexy.
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