The Difference Between Kinks & Fetishes

When we’re talking about kinks and fetishes, it’s important to know what the hell we’re talking about. So, before we get too far into Kink Month here on LTASEX, I wanted to make sure everyone was clear on the difference between a kink and a fetish.

Kinks

In simple terms, kinks are any activity from the world of BDSM. What activities are those? Well you know spanking and tickling and bondage and fisting. Cuckold and dom/sub and voyeur and breath play. But do you recall think sluttiest kink of them all? Yay… it’s like slutty kinky Christmas in July.

You can have one kink or a whole grocery list. Usually people with one kink have a few more that are related in some way. If you like spanking, you’ll probably enjoy other similar kinks flogging, paddling or caning.

As we discussed last week, “kinks and fetishes are like HPV and Herpes, you should just assume everyone has one or both.” Kinks can be the main focus of a person’s sex play but usually they’re something extra and may not even be enjoyed every time a person has sex.

Fetishes

A fetish is a sexual fixation on one object or activity. I once read somewhere that anything under the sun can be fetishized, including the sun. I’ve been been doing this long enough that I know quite well that even that isn’t broad enough. I like to say that, if something exists, even as a thought, someone’s got a fetish for it.

While people can have a bunch of different fetishes, they tend to only have one or two and they’re generally very, very, VERY specific.

“I can only get hard if when I’m riding a horse in the rain while singing I’m a little teapot.”

Kinks are more common than fetishes but they’re still really common. For those with them, fetishes are usually the main or sole part of sex. If someone as a foot fetish, they may rub, kiss and lick their partner’s feet while doing other things to achieve orgasm. Usually, fetsishes are so intertwined with the person’s sexuality that they can’t get off without it but that varies wildly.

And now you know…. And knowing is half the battle.