Although I always tell people to simply ask for what they want, I know some things are harder to ask for than others. Asking your traditionally straight boyfriend to sit on your face is one of those.
Most heterosexual men reflexively don’t want to have anything to do with receiving anal pleasure. So, allowing you to munch on their gorgeous ass might seem a bit extreme. Even still, not all hope is lost; here are a few pointers.
Determine if you need to ask
Although guys can be squeamish about the idea, many will give it a try in the heat of the moment. If you and your guy share each other’s bodies freely and you know this won’t trigger anything with him, you can probably just creep back there during a blow job. Once he experiences the pleasure of you licking and stimulating the perineum (taint), there should be very little resistance to you moving an inch or two lower to his anus. Plus, in the moment, he’ll be more desiring of pleasure and resist that automatic “no” he’s developed.
If you think it’d be better to ask for permission first, the next time you’re messing around, tell him, “Hey, I really want to eat your ass right now. Do you mind?” While it may give him pause, most guys will agree — if only to please you. He may need a little convincing, but that’s why I wrote the next tip.
Let him know why you want to eat his ass
Often when we want to do something to our partner’s bodies, we get caught discussing if the activity is ok. That’s a losing game; most people determine right or wrong based on momentary feelings rather than logical thought. Avoid this fight by staying on topic: You want to eat his ass. Tell him exactly why.
Does he have a big, jiggly ass that begs for attention? Is the lure of his tight little virgin pucker keeping you up at night? Do you simply want to explore his body and help discover all the pleasure his body is capable of? Whatever the reason, let him know and focus on that.
Deal with the “that’s gay” stigma
1. Although I know it happens in gay porn a lot, I don’t actually know many gay dudes who regularly eat ass. Even if every gay man on earth did it simultaneously, that still wouldn’t make a woman licking a man’s ass a homosexual activity.
2. No one except him and you will know about it. If a guy gets rimmed in a bedroom and no one is around to call it gay, is it really gay?
3. Go find some porn with straight guys getting rimmed. Seeing it happen is way less scary than thinking about it. The only thing he’s probably thinking about is how he’d feel if people found out, not the reality of the sex and pleasure he’s missing. If he sees a guy he respects or identifies with doing something new (being rimmed, then slamming some vagina) he’ll see his potential pleasure and that, afterward, nothing will have really changed. That should make him more likely to feel ok about doing it himself.
Give him time, and accept you may be waiting forever
Straight dudes, like everyone, have a tendency to be uncomfortable with change. Masculinity is often based on how well a guy can prevent himself from feeling unacceptable things. While rimming is nothing more than licking skin, the act is covered in all this social muck that makes it seem like a big deal. Receiving pleasure shouldn’t cause a major life crisis, but it often can. So, you have to be patient sometimes. You also have to be ok with him never changing his mind.